Whatever My Lot

I have a confession. I was scared to go to church tonight. Justin called on his way home from work and said he really wanted us to go. I just now have started feeling up to walking around, but I immediately began searching my brain for excuses. We'll have to rush through dinner. I was on my feet a lot today. My c-section incision still really hurts. But, the truth of it was that I was terrified of being hugged, having my shoulder patted or anything of the like that would make me melt into a ball of tears. Yes, the normally bubbly, peppy Melinda was frightened of being loved on.

Ultimately, Justin convinced me to go. As soon as we walked into the lobby people were so happy to see us and I admittedly also was happy to see everyone. I was hugged and I did not crumble. I somehow managed to stay strong through all of the questions and checking Adele into the childcare.

However, as we took our seats, they started singing "It Is Well With My Soul." Now, on a normal day this song would get me weepy, so today it really hit me. In that moment, I felt like I could have written that song (if I had that kind of musical talent). I hope that "whatever my lot," I can always reflect the lyrics of that hymn.

So, despite the minor breakdown during worship, church was a good decision and I'm glad Justin pushed me to go. It really was nice seeing everyone and being reminded of how loved Elliot already is! It was also so fun to see Adele running around with some of the other girls after the service... that child is such a bright spot. I can't tell you much I missed her while I was in the hospital.

In other news, Elliot is doing really well! I posted a couple of my favorite shots from this week up top. He's really such a cutie. He's gained a total of four ounces since birth so he's up to 4 pounds, 7 ounces - I'm convinced at least two of those pounds are from those cheeks! Check those out - reminds me so much of his big sister. They've also been able turn down the temperature in his isolette, which means he's getting better at regulating his temp on his own. Feeding still remains his biggest challenge. He's not really showing any consistency in how much milk he takes and rarely finishes a bottle, which means he gets the remainder through a tube. The doctors keep assuring us that he's progressing well and reminding us to be patient.... that he'll be home before we know it! What a great day that will be!

Also, Justin and I just want to say thanks for the outpouring of love, encouragement and prayers we have received since Elliot's birthday. Even though we knew we wanted to be totally transparent with Elliot's birth story, we honestly did not know how people would react to our news and my candidness about the experience. But, of course, God is great and it is clear that he has surrounded us with wonderful, supportive people throughout our lives. We've both been so humbled by the phone calls, texts and Facebook messages from everyone... including people we may not have spoken to in years! We really do appreciate it all and thank you from the bottom of our hearts!